The Final Month

Well, I have officially reached the ninth month of my last pregnancy, ever. And no, I’m not just saying that either. This will be the last baby Jordan and I will ever have.

Most people think I’ll regret the decision, but I don’t think I’ve been more sure about anything in my whole life. Initially, we had planned for Norah, our rainbow baby after two losses, to be our last. But then almost a year later, God showed us He had other plans. I mean from the moment of knowing, it just flowed and we knew it was meant to be and we were just as excited, if not more. But now, we both agreed {first thing we’ve ever mutually agreed on without hesitation} that this is our official last baby. We are ready to move forward with our lives and the four precious children God has blessed us with. So with that being said, I will be having a Tubal Ligation six weeks after little E makes her appearance. And Jordan has also let me know that he is also preparing himself for a Vasectomy in the near future. As a momma of almost four children, I feel so relieved knowing that we have created this amazing little family together and having this feeling of completeness is the best. My heart has never been fuller.

I am trying SO hard to enjoy these last few weeks of pregnancy and soak up every little detail, but at the same time I am so so so excited to meet our newest little love and love on her and hold her from the outside. I don’t think I’ve ever been more excited to breastfeed another baby, stay up late with a newborn, smell that sweet new baby scent  because all of these firsts will be our lasts. I just want to be able to enjoy every last little moment. 

As of this very moment though, I will not miss this fiery heartburn every time I lay down, the constant backaches, the feeling of not being able to breathe and most definitely— I will not miss having to sleep on my left side. I absolutely despise sleeping on my side, I’m more of a stomach sleeper and right now, that’s not happening with this watermelon under my shirt. 

To think that I have been pregnant SIX times in the last eight years. To think that we have not just one, but two sweet babies whom we’ve never met. And to think that we were lucky enough to be able to keep four of them here on Earth with us. Blessed. That’s exactly what we have been. Now, when I had my miscarriages back in 2016, I just had Addie and Carson at that time. Now almost 3 years later, we have two more babies. I’m not saying that Norah and Everlee have replaced those babies in ANY means, but God took two babies home quicker than we had imagined and in return he gave us two more babies. That’s why I say we are blessed. He has blessed us greatly, y’all. It’s unbelievable. Three years ago, I had lost all of my hope in expanding our family. Now, it’s bigger than I ever imagined possible. 

“With God all things are Possible!” — Matthew 19:26


Everlee Jane — you are so so loved my dear. We are all anxiously awaiting your arrival. Your brother and sisters cannot wait to meet you and I can’t wait for you to meet them, either. Until then, keep growing sweet girl and get ready for tons of loves once you are here. We are so excited to see who you will be. 

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